And the time continues to march on - we're on 31 weeks now. 9 weeks (plus or minus) to go. Another doctor appointment this week, another thankfully uneventful visit. I continue to do well, Sprout is growing and doing well and I am getting so good at peeing in a cup. That may have been TMI... I was measuring at 32cm when I was 30 weeks and 6 days. So still just a little large, but steadily growing.

Sprout now has a doctor for after she's born! Dr Loiselle has agreed to see her. That makes me feel better, that she has someone. While Neil and I are are with another doctor, their offices are side by side in the same building. And Dr Loiselle is younger, I hope that Sprout can have the consistency that I had with my doctor (I have been seeing him for 30-ish years - the man knows me and that is reassuring).

We got a few more diaper inserts and a few disposable diapers, just in case. Today I want to get back into the baby's room and continue to sort and clean and wash everything.

And now for a day long pause in typing...

Today was not a good day for my body. This morning I threw up for only the third time this pregnancy (first two were before 12 weeks and had a cause). I have been sore and tired and achy. I tried to sit up and somehow pulled something in my belly, which thankfully isn't still hurting. Sprout's movements are starting to really be felt. Basically, today everything is getting uncomfortable. I still got a lot of laundry done (both for adults and for Sprout), cleaned half the bathroom, made bread and other house stuff. But I definitely was not as productive as I could have been.

Well, this little one is dancing up a storm and sitting just isn't working. I think it eats into her space. Off to bed to relax and stretch!

30 weeks

How can we be at 30 weeks already???! Time is flying by...

In 10 weeks it's Sprout's due date. In 7 weeks she's considered full term. In 2 weeks? She'll be considered ready to come out - not fully baked but close. TWO WEEKS! Which has sent me into a bit of a panic, needing to get the nursery finished. Tomorrow we get the dresser and the pieces we're getting to organize the closet. Then I can start washing everything and figuring out where to put everything.

Sprout is about 16 inches long and around 3 lbs 12 ounces or more. And it's starting to hit me that she's going to have to COME OUT. Ack! But i know that pain will be finite. It'll hurt more than anything I can even begin to imagine but in 2, 10, 24, 36 hours... it'll be over and I can heal. The forever part is having a person, another human being, that I am responsible to raise. Neil and I will need to help her shape her morals, her values, her beliefs. And that part is the part that scares me most. I know that I will do things wrong. I know that some of the decisions I will make will come from a place of love but be perceived by Sprout as something less pure. I know that in 15 years (well, less) she'll think I am the stupidest person alive. Or at least the one who doesn't understand ANYTHING! And that by saying no I ruined her life. And 20 years from now I'll be blamed for whatever psychological crisis she's having, whatever flaws she sees in herself, real or imagined. But I want her to know that everything we'll do and say really will come from a place of love. From two people who only want everything to be right for her. Maybe 30 years from now she'll be able to see that...

Today I went on the annual shopping trip with my goddaughter for her birthday and Christmas gifts. Well, I ended up buying one thing for Sprout. And I shouldn't have... it won't fit her for something like 5 years. And by then it'll be so completely out of style. But I am a geek... Neil is a geek... and it seemed to perfectly GEEKY! I think this is the kind of thing she'll mention in therapy one day.

I am sorry, my little one!

Wednesday, after a horrible night's sleep and many aching spots on my body I had enough. I was just tired of being pregnant. I wanted to bend over, I wanted a glass of wine, I wanted to sleep on my stomach... but after a solid night's sleep (as solid as they come now) I felt better and still excited about the journey we're on. Even though I still miss bending over, drinking wine and sleeping on my stomach I am not ready for Sprout to come yet. I am willing to hold onto the aching ribs (and the pins and needles in my ribs), the sore hips and back, the widening feet that fit no shoes anymore, the random itchy spots, the constant tiredness just to know that she's continuing to grow and get ready for the world outside in a place of safety. And while I still smile when she stretches one of her long legs into my side (often the exact same spot) it's now starting to hurt more! One night in bed she was pushing out. Neil leaned over and pushed her back in. I think it confused her... she stopped pushing for a few seconds... then pushed back harder. I just hope that she isn't as stubborn as I am. And if she takes Neil's stubborness and my stubborness together? We're in a LOT of trouble!

Week 29

Yesterday I went to the doctor. Both me and Sprout continue to do so well. The doctor even said that we're a low-risk pregnancy. Which is a wonderful thing to hear, since I started in a higher risk group based on my age alone. I had concerns about the mom care docs - the group of GPs that also do some OB work. I was scared to meet the other ones, since I was comfortable with the one I had. Well, the doctor I saw yesterday? I wanted to hug her by the end of the visit! She was awesome! She spent a long time with me, just chatting and answering my questions. She was friendly and open. She used to work in a smaller town, where there were no OBs, and has delivered over 4000 babies. Hell, she even subbed in for an OB when he needed to take some time off. We're on to the bi-monthly visits now. In 2 weeks I am back for more cup peeing, more measuring and more weighing. Weighing... ugh.

I was SO happy to see that I had only gained 12lbs from the day after I peed on the stick to about a week ago. But then I measure myself in the morning, before food etc. Yesterday afternoon? The grand total was 20lbs. Which sounds SO much more. But I am still in the normal weight game range-ish and I am feeling well and looking well. So, I have to stop sweating the numbers! Although I do have a magical number that I do not want to go over. So far, I am under that by a fair bit.

Yesterday I also bought our first diapers! We made the choice to try gDiapers to start, available at London Drugs. It's a nice blend of environmentally friendly and the convenience of disposable. The inserts, the only part you throw away, can be flushed or composted. They are completely biodegradable. And the outer shell can be washed in the machine when it gets soiled. I spent a lot of time reading and looking into diapers. I didn't want to leave a huge footprint from Sprout's bodily functions, and so cloth was the way to go. Right? Well, the more I looked into cloth, the more concerns I had. The amount of washing it takes for them to be properly cleaned is a lot. A hot wash, cold wash then extra rinse. Studies have shown that the amount of energy used to make the disposables and to make and clean the cloth diapers is about equivalent. If you take into account the landfill, then cloth wins. But the footprint I was leaving was still large. And then I found gDiapers. The cloth pants still may need to be washed, but only once. The inserts can be flushed and treated that way (although our old toilet pipes may not be able to handle the additional strain - we'll see. If not? Placed in a biodegradable kitchen bag and then tossed). And while there is still a footprint, it feels less. That makes me feel better. And OMG they are so cute too! Now here's hoping Sprout is cooperative and her skin likes the gDiapers. After that huge ramble... I bought 4 cloth pants and 2 bags of inserts (on sale right now at London Drugs) as a start. We have pink, orange, brown and cream!

And a NEW VEGGIE!

That thing? It's a squash. It will carry us through weeks 29-32. Right now Sprout is just continuing to grow and everything is just ripening. She's getting fatter and fatter. This month she's get to between 15 and 17 inches, 2.5 to almost 4 pounds. With her increasing size, her kicks are really being felt! Yesterday at the doc's she was head down. Today she's feeling more head up. I think she's still flip-flopping back and forth. But soon my little one will be head down all the way (we hope) and getting ready for her grand entrance!

I am still doing really well. Some tiredness, some swelling, some aches. This morning I couldn't last another minute in bed and was up by 8am because my ribs on the right side were just aching! And I had a pretty restless sleep, but I am still feeling good this morning. One thing that I truly love is the feeling of Sprout's kicks. When she kicks me really hard, where I can see my stomach move, it always makes me giggle! I am tickle-me-Elmo in reverse! It's just such a wonderful feeling, that she's moving around in there. And we're also moving to the point where I am beginning to feel like Sprout is someone separate from me. This sounds a little strange, and I may not be able to clearly express it, but to date Sprout has been a part of me. Inside me, moving with me, a part of me. Like a new organ. Now she's starting to feel and act like another person, another being. Yes, she's still inside me and her world is controlled by my body. But she is still her own person now. For example, I was sitting on the glider chair the other day, testing it out and watching TV. I was rocking away and the chair stopped moving. Then I felt a few kicks... and I started rocking again. And she calmed. After a few minutes I let the rocking stop and then? More kicks! Maybe it was a coincidence, maybe I am reading more into it, but she liked the rocking and let me know she wanted it to keep happening. She's her own person, with her own reactions and her own likes. It's such a miraculous feeling, to know she's inside me and yet something that is not a part of me.

Well, a fun day ahead of grocery shopping and then a 3yr old's birthday! Tomorrow morning I'm going to set the breadmaker to have a warm loaf of bread ready for when we wake. I could really get used to fresh bread!

We have reached a few milestones!

First, another bump pic!

Reminder to self, next time you take a picture? BRUSH YOUR HAIR! But bigger still and so much growing left to do.

The second milestone is that the nursery renos are done! Neil has been amazing the last few days finishing it all up and it looks awesome. The change table has been around for a few weeks. The glider came last night and the crib came tonight. And I have the pleasure of putting it all together! One of my secret (sick) loves? Putting furniture together. There are times I'll go to IKEA just to buy something to assemble. I wish I were joking.

We got the glider and crib through costco.ca and I have to say, shipping was free and FAST and the products are really great. Despite the fact that there are three brands in the room, the colour of the wood and the styles are really quite similar. One last purchase, a dresser to put all her stuff in and we're done. And there is one at IKEA I have been looking at. More assembling!

As you can see, the room is small. We have a glider, then the change table then the dresser will be near the change table. Across is the crib. Mattress is coming on Nov 28th. My mom is making the crib bedding and also (once I talk her into it) the curtains. The colour doesn't come out well. It's blue-green, not grey as the pictures suggest. We need a bit of art/wall decoration. And I want to put in a closet organizer, to maximize the minimal space. But I think it looks gorgeous and I am so excited to see the room that our little girl will be sleeping in come together.

We registered - and it was fun and tiring

We registered today at Toys R Us/Babies R Us. It was loads of fun to wander around and point at stuff with the scanner. And, of course, I made a list of the things we need and the brands we prefer. And we managed to check most everything off the list there. There were a few things, like the dust ruffle and the nursing cover that I wasn't over the moon about. And there were also a few spur-of-the-moment scans too. Like the duck shaped humidifier. But, seriously DUCK shaped!!! I have to say, though, it was tiring. My body just gives out way sooner than it used to. Plus, I need more supportive shoes. Damn, I sound like a grandma... But for the most part, a very successful adventure!

EDIT: Well, we were successful. The Toy R Us registry? FAIL! There is an issue with the SKU numbers. You can't differentiate different colours in the same product. Anyone who reads this and possibly will buy a gift (damn, THAT sounds greedy) colours to choose are PINK and GREEN. NOT BLUE AND YELLOW!

Week 28

Week 28... 12 weeks to go. Week 30 is on the horizon. AND WE AREN'T READY YET! Which is ok, we will be. I see the light at the end of the tunnel! *grin*

We are on the last week of the eggplant (a new fruit next week). Sprout's little eyes can now respond to light and dark and she's blinking. She's quite active, I can feel her moving or shuffling. But she's not a huge kicker, very few times have I jumped in shock. But from the ultrasounds, it looks like there is a lot of room in there and she likes to curl up in a ball. Once the tech commented I must have felt that large kick - and nope. Sprout is also getting chubbier and chubbier! Now we're in the fattening stage - just letting her fully develop in the safety of inside me.

Me? I think I am starting to swell. My fingers are puffier and my shoes are smaller. But the good thing is that my wedding rings now almost fit (I sized them too large, accidentally). And I am more tired again. Thursday night I completely crashed. I was useless. But Neil was the sweetest man ever, and made dinner, cleaned up, checked on me in the bath and brought me water and oranges THEN he had the bed turned down, waiting for me to get into it. I was in bed by 930 and slept the night away. I still woke up tired... but after another marathon sleep last night (11 hours with minimal waking) I feel somewhat human today. Thankfully! Because we're having friends over this afternoon. Considering I am so tired now and I am still sleeping somewhat well... I can't even imagine the sleep deprivation coming in 12 weeks. Not getting long stretches of sleep, having a human completely reliant on me for everything, always... This is why, I think, it's important to sleep as much as I can now. Plus, I will not be afraid to ask for help from my parents and Neil. I have to desire to wear myself out trying to be everything.

One failure, one pass, and one little pretzel girl

I mentioned awhile back that I was going for a diabetes screen. Well, the screen? I failed it. Not by a huge amount - I was just in the borderline range (normal is up to 7.8 and I was 9.8 - a diagnosis in non-preggos is 11.1). FAILURE!

I had to go back yesterday and do the full-meal test. Which meant no meals... I had to fast for 10 hours then do a 2 hour test. It's mean to make a pregnant woman fast that long. I didn't feel normal again until this morning. AND I had to get three (omg THREE) needles. A baseline, after 1 hour and then after 2 hours. Well, I got the news this afternoon - I passed! No worries about diabetes here (thankfully). But it was a bit of a wake-up call. There is so much diabetes in the family, I really should be smarter about my diet. And actually, we are being really good about our meals.

Today we ordered the crib and the glider. Then we'll see it all together and all the different shades of brown. The change table is from The Bay. The matching crib to the change table is just stupid expensive (and we're smartly cheap) so we're going with a Graco crib. And then the glider is ANOTHER brand with another shade of "espresso". But once we have it all we'll figure out the best placement and how big of a dresser we can fit in, if we even can. It really is such a small room. Tomorrow night we'll paint the casings/baseboards and then the day after DAP and then... and THEN? We're even closer to being ready.

And Neil gave the go-ahead for us to register for baby stuff this weekend! I am SO EXCITED! We never had the chance to register for gifts for the wedding (officially) and I have always wanted to walk around and indiscriminatly point the pointer at things. Although, in the TRUE geek style of me, I made a list of the things and sometimes even the brands of stuff I want to register for. The thing that I am least certain about are the bottles. Neil and I will go with BPA-free plastic. And Dr. Brown's is supposed to be amazing. But the plastic bottles from them have high chemical leach, apparently. We're looking at Born Free. Does anyone out there have an opinion?

And lastly, we went to see the little one again tonight. She was marginally more cooperative - she put her hands and/or feet down for about 5 minutes. Before putting them back up in her face...

But a few great shots!

One of her with her eyes open, her little mouth puckered up in a kiss. And that thing beside her head? Her leg. Of course.

Here are two pictures of her yawning

And what most of the pics looks like.

Feet/legs in her face.

But if you were stuck in the same room for 9 months, wouldn't you do what you could to amuse yourself?

*formatting around the pics is weird. But I am too tired to fix it. I am lazy...

Dropped

Today is the day I think Sprout dropped. There is new pressure in my pelvic bone. I can feel her moving in different ways. And a co-worker even said she thinks I am carrying lower. Which makes moving even more of a challenge. And sitting is not comfortable.

Yes, I know it'll only get harder! But I have to say I am excited about this next stage - we're even closer to meeting our little girl.

week 27

Yesterday we reached week 27! 13 weeks to go... or so. Wow. Only 13 weeks.

Yesterday my mom and I bought a bunch of material for the receiving blankets she's sewing for me and the quilts she's making. I LOVE main pattern we chose, it's a subtle teal with cherries and cream leaves. Quite vintage and subdued. Of course my mom thinks it's not right for a baby, and prefers and something more colourful. But both Neil and I love it. And we got LOADS of fleece for receiving blankets too. And today we worked on the nursery more. Neil wants to re-cut 2 baseboards and then install the door casings on the outside of the door. Then we have to wood fill the remaining holes, sand the already wood-filled baseboards and casing, paint it up, and then dap it all! And THEN we're done! Done the renos... then comes the crib and mattress purchase, chair and ottoman, dresser/organizer for the closet. THEN we can put in the rug and start hanging things on the wall (which we need to buy) and wash all the clothes and put everything away... Then we can figure out what more we need. OK, I need a nap just thinking about all that!

Sprout may also have a name. I had a dream, earlier this week, where I was talking about Sprout, telling a story about her when she was 5 or 6 years old. I was saying "And then ____ went to play with..." (or something along those lines) and in my dream I stopped and said "Wow, so that's her name!". And since then, in my head she's just had that name. I want to meet her, before we make the final decision. But Neil is OK with the name. Although he's asked for carte blanche naming of the second child, if we have one. I dunno about that... *grin*

Sprout is about 2 lbs and 14.5 inches. And dancing around in my belly! She is still head up but (hopefully) soon will make the switch to the birthing position. Her little lungs are now capable of breathing on her own. Well, with a lot of intensive help from the doctors. But she could do it if she had to. I just hope she continues to stay inside and get larger and larger.

I am also doing well. More hormonal, for sure. More tired, it's harder to move. The only symptom I am not having that I SO wish I would is the "baby furnace". I am still always cold. In fact, right now I am thinking of crawling into bed to warm up. Although if I do, then I'd sleep, then I'd be up in the night... Well, after this "riveting" glimpse into my slowed thought process I should sign off and get something done. This has NOT been an example of great writing. I'll do better next time (as long as I am awake then).