Month Forty-One. And Forty-Two.

Dearest Maddy,

I have heard "them" say with children the days are long but the years are short. Which kind of explains what happened these months... I have a LIST of things to write on about you. Each could be it's own post! Oh Maddy, I know I am going to regret not writing more and saving these moments.

You, right now, are forty-two and a half months old. And ill. You, my love, have a summer cold. And this weekend you have been whiny and grumpy and not eating much. With intermittent fevers. So I sent you to daycare today... and... Well. Yah. They sent you home. And you got to spend the day hanging out with Daddy! I am thinking tomorrow will be another day at home. This time with me. And we'll make it a magical day of videos and snuggling.

One fun thing we started doing is naming all the people you love. Mommy. Daddy. Baba. Dido. Walter. And Maddy. Maddy, you love Maddy.

And you LAUGHED.

And I realized how weird it is to think of loving yourself. I was in my mid-twenties before someone made me think to love yourself. And we're trying to teach you that now. Now, you can say with confidence that you love Maddy. For some reason I think that will matter...

Taking this somewhere else, last time I wrote it was about potty training. And you? Are POTTY TRAINED! It took 4 weeks. 4 looong weeks of washing panties. And then? You pooed on the potty. Of COURSE it was a Sunday night. After Target was closed. So we promised the next day, after daycare, we would go to Target. After buying the stroller. And cart. And other things we needed. $75 later. A $75 poo. And? WORTH EVERY PENNY. You have been so so so great since. Maddy, you have fears about your abilities in the beginning. You aren't sure you can do something... then you do it. And once you do it once, you have all the confidence in the world.

You are on the verge of reading. And then you get scared... and you say you can't. But you will. Once that happens you will be unstoppable. And then we're going to have to figure out a new way to secretly communicate, instead of spelling things out. Because Maddy. It's all we have. You are SMART. We used to use reverse psychology to get you to do things. Not anymore. And you see things, get things, understand things. A new book on the shelf? You notice. I hang the curtains again, after having windows replaced? You notice (your dad did not).

Although the other thing you started, that shows your smarts (and scares us) is...

Lying.

Yes, at THREE you  have started lying. When you poo, you get a popsicle. It's one I make myself, made with yogurt. But a popsicle for every poo. And the other night, you went into the bathroom and second later announced a poo. And you deserved a popsicle. We questioned the speed of pooing. And lack of flush, wiping or... you know. TIME. And you asserted, you did poo. We looked. No poo. You caved. But it isn't going to take you long to get the subtlies of lying. Then we're screwed.

But you are still so eager to help. So happy to be part of it all. So wonderful... So amazing. So three and a half. So perfect. So everything to us. Maddy, I am not sure we will ever be able to make you understand how much we love you. But we do. Totally. Completely. Always. For exactly who you are. All bossy, lying, stubborn, whiny three you are. Everything.

Always.

Love,

Mama